aim high

My dad used to teach people how to drive tractor trailers as part of his job, so you can imagine how thrilled I was to have him teach me to drive a car. It was like school - learning little catch phrases and acronyms to make me a better, more defensive driver.

Shockingly enough, a little gem of wisdom came back to me today: aim high in steering. If you're new to driving school lingo, that means looking toward the road far up ahead instead of the road immediatey in front of you. It gives you a view of the whole road, including traffic issues ahead, and allows for time to think about a plan of action if you need one. The other thing I find, even after driving for over 20 years, is that when I don't aim high, my car isn't centered in the lane.

When you're 16 years old and have a brand new permit in your pocket, the annoying driving-school-dad's advice seems really dumb. I'm sure at the time I gave him a good eye-roll after the hundredth time hearing him tell me to aim high. Obviously the advice stuck, though, and at 37 years old here I am still remembering it. But the reason I remembered it today had nothing to do with driving my car.

My Dad is dying...It's kind of "official". It's not imminent, but for the first time one of his doctors gave him a definitive time frame. I've gone back and forth and up and down with my emotions and my ability to cope. I grieve one thing and I think I'm fine, but then another wave comes. But what I'm coming to depend on with my whole self is that this life isn't the whole picture. My dad is saved and will soon be whole again, guitar in hand at the throne of Jesus - that is the promise of his salvation, and my hope as I go forward from here. 

Aiming high isn't just for driving - it's for living. I need to keep my eyes on what is ahead so that I can have an understanding of the things that happen in my life, good and bad.  Hebrews 12:1-3 says this:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Why did Christ endure the cross? Because he was aiming high. So during this time of suffering and sadness, so will I. I will grieve, and the tears will continue to come...but I will not despair in these circumstances because I know that my Redeemer lives and is preparing a place for my dad, and for me.